Thursday, September 22, 2011

Why You Shouldn't Be Friends with Your Mom on Facebook: Reason #289

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My child, who happens to be the mother of a child her own self, posted this status update on her Facebook. I should note that my child refused to friend me on Facebook for years, which caused a terrible rift between us didn't really bother me all that much. Every once in a while I would ask her if we could be friends, and she always said no. I finally gave up .... and then she finally got drunk one night came to her senses and friended me. I told her no because I didn't want her to know some of the crazy shit I was doing just to teach her a lesson ..... but later gave in. She has only herself to blame for the following conversation.

Reticula’s Child: I'm fine with porn, but everything PETA does pisses me off. What a terrible idea.

Hot Italian: PETA jumped the shark years ago. One would almost expect this crap from them at this point.
Reticula: I've used PETA as an example in my 101 classes when we're working on ad analysis. They create expensive ads that they have no intention of airing just to get the negative publicity. I guess it works for them.
Reticula’s Child: Did you read the part about how many animals they euthanize? And how they're going to sneak in animal abuse pictures with the porn? Fuck those people. They're awful and they don't help animal abuse one bit.
Reticula: I can imagine they only took in and then euthanized animals that were in terrible circumstances. What I don't understand is how they think a photo of a naked porn star will entice anybody to spay or neuter an animal. I think they've become publicity hounds (hee) and forgotten their mission.
Reticula’s Child: It's not the porn, that's just to get people on the website. It's the horrible pictures that are mixed in with the porn, I guess. Ugh.
Reticula: I agree with the author of the article. People who click on both porn and animal abuse photos are probably sick people who aren't there to support the vegan lifestyle. It just seems like a desperate, immature move to me. Who's running PETA these days and making these decisions? I don't disrespect them for their message. I don't respect their tactics.
Reticula: Wait. Did you say you're fine with porn? I can't believe you said that.
Reticula’s Child: I have no problem with porn. It really doesn't bother me. Umm, normal porn, that is. It's cheesy and stupid and not particularly arousing, but doesn't offend me. Unless it's wierdo porn.
Reticula’s Child: We should maybe move this conversation into a private message.
Reticula: So you're saying weirdo porn is not cheesy, stupid and un-arousing. Oh, what have I done? How did I fail you?
Reticula’s Child: Hey! No! Weirdo porn is all if those things AND I find it offensive and gross. Word-twisting witch!
Reticula: Bwah ha ha! No child should be born of an English teacher.
Reticula’s Child: Now I'm just trying to have the last word.

Too much sex is never a bad thing.
Reticula: Word.

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