I don't know how your week started, but I was the bitch the first two days. I have no idea why; I was such a grouch I could have kicked a puppy. I thought maybe it was because I was auditioning Monday for a character who is definitely on the crusty side--unless she gets laid every once in a while. Or maybe it was the audition itself, which was a disappointment in many ways.
But, no, I woke up on the wrong side of the bed again Tuesday. Irritable. Get the fuck out of my way crabby. I found I was talking to myself and all I ever said was, "Oh, for fuck's sake! Really?"
I was so grouchy one of my students even noticed. Before class started, while I was logging on to my computer, which requires entering my user name and password 57 times, and refusing to accept several late papers (I don't accept late papers; read the fucking syllabus) and rolling my eyes at the many excuses for absences (I got my face pierced and it hurt so bad I couldn't come to class.
Thanks for noticing. |
Oh yeah. One of my students, who is apparently remarkably perceptive, said, "Are you OK today. You seem a little....?"
I said, "I'm grouchy today. I have been all day today and yesterday too. I don't know why, but I seem to be feeling a certain degree of irritation right now. How did you guess?"
She said I was twisting my hands in an unusual way. She was right. I was unconsciously wringing necks. I relaxed my hands and settled for grinding my teeth down to the gums. She warned the rest of the class, which had no perceptible impact on them at all.
The good news is, I got through both days without hurting anyone. I didn't even respond with well deserved derision to the email I got from one student's email account that was supposedly an appeal from his dad, asking if he could be excused indefinitely. Sometimes a failing grade says so much more than the immediate sarcastic reply.
I wasn't the only one. Several friends asked me if things just felt off, crazy, annoying. I took some comfort in knowing I wasn't in a foul,
Step off, bitch. Sarandon is mine. |
In an effort to bring me out of it, one friend invited me out for lunch and pool at a new place, a clean, smoke-free place with pretty nice tables. We played pool for a couple of hours and I never once had the urge to break my cue over anybody. In fact, a friendly bald man came back to the pool room from the bar, put his arm around me and said, "I bet $5.00 on you."
"Huh?" I couldn't comprehend his words. Anyone who has ever played pool with me knows it's the cheapest date you can take me on because a game with me can last 2 hours if I'm allowed to get all my balls in. I'm terrible. Nobody would bet on me to win, except this friendly bald man.
He apologized to my friend and said, "No offense, but we've been watching and my money is on her." He hugged me, good and long. I never try to predict the behavior of the natives in a new environment. I hugged my new stalker back.
And then I lost the game. Because I suck at pool.
(This is not me. I don't wear a glove when I play pool.)
But I still wasn't in a bad mood. In fact, even though the next thing I did was shop for clothes--something I hate--I felt almost normal. (Except for those hour-long minutes in the dressing room under the florescent lights when I looked in the mirror and saw what Cookie Monster would look like without his fur. Oh the cruelty.)
I was feeling much better already and then I met..... well, crap. This is getting too long and self-reflective. I need to wrap it up ....
Before I do though, I'll just go ahead and mention that I was going to write about meeting Scott, a gorgeous
Completely.
How about you? Any grouchies this week? Was there something in the atmosphere that was fucking with the general mood? Did you find a remedy?
Just keep flying and everything will be fine. |
My wings got soaked this morning. No flying for me, alas.
ReplyDeleteI'll selfishly say that I'm glad you were grouchy because this was such fun to read, today.
You can say that because you're far away from me, Deb.
DeleteI liked it too!
ReplyDeleteI'm not officially doing NaBloPoMo, but I am going to write every day. Here's my dilemma: I now have THREE blogs! I've gone completely insane, I think! I did the Unschooling Blog Carnival on the 1st (that's on it's own blog). Then on the 2nd, I did the Behind the Scenes post for the UBC on my Lifelong Learning blog, and I wrote a Ground Hog Day post, but forgot to publish it until tonight. And tonight I did a Friday Family Update. Both for my Life Full of Days blog. So the promise to myself is one blog post per day, regardless of which blog I choose. But that doesn't fit with Blogher, I don't think.
Sorry to clutter all your comment area up with my crap. But there ya have it!
Clutter away. You don't have to post on one blog only for NaBloPoMo. You don't even have to have your own blog. You can post exclusively on Blogher. As long as you post once a day, you meet the commitment.
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking about opening a second blog, a secret sex blog. I'd be the only one reading it though because it would be a secret.
And Elvira is going to start one (a blog, not a secret sex blog), but she can't come up with a name. Lots of people open a blog with a great name, then post once and let it sit there and rot.
I was definitely a Grumpy McGrumperson for most of the week. February is a dreadful month. My grandmother used to always go on a trip in February to escape its slimy grasp attempting to pull her into Grumpville.
ReplyDeleteAnd really? "I got my face pierced" as an excuse to miss class is like saying, "I need an excused absence for bad decision making." I had a client's mother call and tell me they missed their session because she couldn't find her shoes. "My son was all ready to go," she said, "he really wanted to see you, but I just can't find my shoes!" My favorite, though, was the client who told me she was 30 mins late because of traffic, and her 5 year old told me "no we wasn't, we was late 'cause mommy was having sex with her boyfriend." Whoops.
I would take having sex as an excuse over many of them I get.
ReplyDeleteFebruary really does suck no matter how many fun activities I plan.