Monday, June 3, 2013

More dangers of dining down under

I kind of hate to write this because I don't want to give cunnilingus a bad name, because the word itself already sounds like somebody hacking up a hairball but a reader posted this link to my Facebook wall today. It's a Huffington Post article about Michael Douglas, who claims he got throat cancer from the HPV virus, a virus he contracted through the cunnilingual act. Not smoking. Not drinking. Not giving blow jobs (although he gave a persuasive, if creepy, performance in HBO's recent movie about Liberace, Under the Candelabra).  Cunnilingus. (He's a gentleman so he calls it that.)

Way to take one for the team, Michael Douglas.

Of course neither cancer nor murder by cunnilingus is really funny. I'm certainly not laughing. Actually even though National Masturbation Month is over, I'm thinking about Michael Douglas going down ..... Oh, are you still reading? Nevermind....  What I meant to say was who knew eating pussy was such a dangerous act? I've certainly never known anyone to suffer any ill effects from dining down there in my 5-star restaurant. Have you?

So even if a couple of men have experienced less than savory experiences, I say we all keep that to ourselves, so as not to scare away any potential lady-bit nibblers, K? K.


  1. All I can say is WHAT? Is that even possible? I getting off right now and doing an internet search.

    Michael Douglas, that better be scientifically possible or I will boycott your movies forever...blaming your cancer on the vagina!! What the hell has the world come too.

    I MUST stop reading your posts. YOu are such a bad influence on me! (SMILE) Funny as usual!

  2. You'd think a lot more men would have throat cancer, right? In fact, all men should have throat cancer by now! Let me know what you find out. Was it the vagina or is he making shit up?

    I've been called a bad influence before. Unfortunately, calling that out has never changed one damn thing. I'm incorrigible. ;-)