Tears for heroes: Day 26

Every day my Facebook feed is filled with shit that makes me get all the uncomfortable feels: rage, incredulity, fear, terror, shock, horror. And that's just the orange dog fart's tweets.

In my real life I've got plenty of things to worry about. For example I was researching security systems tonight and realized my downstairs furnace wasn't running and the front parlor was cold. Sigh. I got the furnace to come on and it blew cold air and then shut off. I went downstairs and smelled the faint odor of gas, so I called a local 24-hour furnace business. The woman who took my information said the guy would call me. It's been almost two hours. Fuck him. I've got another furnace upstairs. I'll get it fixed tomorrow by someone else. And fuck all the asshole men who are forcing me to get a security system. I could use that money for so many other things especially with the winter holidays coming up. See? Just tonight. Plenty to worry about.

And don't even get me started on grief. I want to tell my mom so many things that are happening right now, just to know she's on my side and that she's as upset as I am. She wasn't such a good listener all the time, but she did when it was important and she really needs to know some of this stuff. I miss her.

So in order to balance out the political, the worries, and the grief, I've been clinging to the stories about small acts of kindness, stories about people who are in-the-moment heroes, that, oddly enough, are the most likely to make me tear up or even cry. People who see a need and give because they can. Hero stories have always made me cry like the silly sap I am. Remember Billy Jack? There's a lake in southwest Iowa that was made just from my Billy Jack tears. Garbage truck driver who rescues an elderly woman from a fire and hauls her out of there in his truck. Oh, hell yes. Boy Scout helping an old woman across the street? Hand me a tissue, Granny.

I'm posting as many of these stories on my Facebook as I can just to remind myself and my friends who we really are. Who we really want to be. So tonight, because I'm worn out and 7:00 is going to be here in < 5 hours, I will simply share this story, which I will admit made me tear up. And I will ask you to please share stories like this too, because even though they make me cry, it's good crying, healing crying, hope crying. And we need all the hope we can get right now.