NaBloPoMo Day 5: Coralineisms #68

Every once in a while I just have to share some of the conversations I have with my granddaughter Coraline. I know. I know. I don't seem mature old enough to have a grandchild. It's just one of those weird things where I was pregnant with my daughter at the same time she was pregnant with her daughter .... Don't overthink it.

And now, Coralineisms #68

My delicious face

Coraline: You taste like frosting ... if I take a bite out of your face.
Me: Please don't.

Coraline: I like frosting.
Me: I like my face more than you like frosting.
Coraline: Can I have a Popsicle then?

It's my face and I'm keeping it

Me: Come here. I'm going to kiss your face off.

Coraline: No! No! Don't kiss my face off. You can't. It's glued on.

Me: Your face is glued on?

Coraline: Yes, and the glue is dry. Don't try to take it off now. It won't come off.

Me: Well, if it's glued on then I probably shouldn't even try.

Coraline: How do faces really stay on, Mamá? Are they glued on?

Me: (long pause) I guess that's as good an explanation as any when you're four.

Personal massager

Coraline: Mamá! Look! You've got a microphone under your bed. Why do you have a microphone under your bed?

Me: Umm, honey, that's not a ...

Coraline: Look! It's purple!

Me: Sweetie, that's not a microphone. That's ... ummm ....

Coraline: I've never seen a purple microphone before. Can I play with your purple microphone? It's plugged in. How do I turn it on? I want to talk into it.

Me: Well, no, because that's .... Coraline, you know you're not allowed to play with my band gear. Here, give me my microphone. You go play with your toys now, and leave mine alone.

Best friends

Coraline: Carley is my very best friend.

Me: I know she is. You talk about her all the time.

Coraline: Who's your best friend?

Me: Oh, I don't know. I don't really have a best friend.

Coraline: You have to have a best friend. Carley is my best friend. Who is yours?

Me: I know, and you're lucky to have a best friend. I don't have one though.

Coraline: (long pause)  Of course you have a best friend, Mamá. I'm your best friend! (Gives me a big hug.)

Me: Thank you, sweetie. That makes me feel better.

Coraline: But Carley is still my best friend too. She's my best best friend.

Me: I know she is. I appreciate that bone you just tossed me.

Coraline: (Hugs me until my face turns blue.) Oh, I love you, Mamá.

Me: I love you more.
Coraline: I love you most. I win.
Me: No, I'm pretty sure I'm the one who wins this one.